The title is actually sadder than the thought… which is doubly sad in sum. But it’s the truth.
A year ago I was released from jail after six months of jail and hospital time (which wasn’t that much different from jail time). Now, working full-time at a criminal defense firm, I sometimes miss jail. Mostly the solitary confinement part, which was infinitely preferable to the bitches in general population.
What did I do? I went through the back door into a house that wasn’t mine. I was higher than a kite, on life (thank you Bipolar Disorder) and actually thought it was my house that someone had given me as an anonymous gift. Long story short, I was arrested and charged with Residential Burglary, though I didn’t actually burgle anything but a pair of flip flops.
What do I miss about jail? Actually, the food. It wasn’t great food, but it was delivered to me like clockwork. When I was in solitary, it was like breakfast (and lunch, and dinner) in bed. True, they have very odd eating times. 430 a.m. was breakfast, 10 am, lunch and 430 pm dinner. But I never had to cook or clean anything and I could flirt with the male inmates who came by at meal time and in the evenings to clean the common areas of 3 South, as they called the solitary unit.
Life wasn’t fun when I was locked up, but it was simpler.
Now, on my way home from work everyday I walk by the jail on my way to the bus stop and reminisce about my time having all of my needs catered to. (needs, not wants). The bad books I read, the interesting people I met. I wouldn’t do anything so stupid as get myself locked up again, since it would likely end worse than my plea bargain for time served and probation for a year. But some days I really do miss the simplicity of jail time.
What do I miss more? My life before the manic episode that landed me homeless for two weeks before I went to jail.